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Mom on Purpose

~ The lofty side of this is that I am a mom on a mission. I am striving to create a better world by being the best, most inner-directed mother I know how to be. The other side of this is that I became a mom… on purpose. Meaning, I chose this. But man, it can be hard.

Mom on Purpose

Category Archives: Creating Health

My Most Fierce and Unforgiving Opponent in the Crossfit Open

23 Sunday Mar 2014

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, Crossfit

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

competition, crossfit, Crossfit Open, Doing your best

This year I decided to sign up for the Crossfit Open.  For those of you unfamiliar with this, it’s a worldwide athletic competition that takes place in Crossfit ‘boxes’ simultaneously every year.  While hundreds of thousands of athletes join up, it is only the elite-level that continue on past the first five weeks.  So I registered, fully aware that it would be  a five week endeavour – and not an easy one.

Crossfit BradfordThe general format is that every Thursday evening there is a workout announced.  These will have a wide variety of components, but with a mix of heavy lifting, high intensity movements, and gymnastics components (think barbells, pull up bars, body-weight movements and more)  All participants must be judged for technique and accuracy by a certified Open judge with scores submitted online by the following Monday.  (If you haven’t heard of any of this yet, check out www.games.crossfit.com)

I almost didn’t register, mostly because I knew that my stress threshold this year has been sitting pretty close to full.  Workouts stressful?  Well, they can be.  IF you have the potential to be as competitive as I can be (which I’d say most crossfitters are).  As a recovering perfectionist, I’d say that the tendency to have very high expectations of myself are always up there.  Yes, it’s just a workout.  But I’m competing against my most fierce and unforgiving opponent:  myself.

At first I didn’t sign up. It wasn’t even on the radar.  But it slowly crept in.  I’ve been training this way for more than 2 years now.  The Open is a great community builder.  It’s a great measure of myself, as well as a way to compare my own gains against those of a larger group.   And maybe it would be a good idea to have something on my plate to push myself that was not work or home-life-related.

I felt like the only way I could take this on and avoid overburdening my stress-meter was to set up some of my own ‘rules’.  I realize that many of the other athletes who do this do so with the attitude of “give it all I’ve got” – (and my approach may actually be considered blasphemy in some circles) –  but for me, I had to take that level of intensity off the table.  I wanted to go through this experience feeling happy with my efforts, while picking up on the areas I want to work on more.  Finally, once I discovered that I wouldn’t hold back my team if any of my scores were low, my decision was made.

My Rules for the Crossfit Open:

Rule 1 – I was doing this for myself.

Rule 2 – I would only compare myself against myself, not anyone else.

Rule 3 – I would not stress or spend undue time ‘strategizing’ my workout beforehand.

Rule 4 – I would only do each workout once.  No repeats.

Rule 5- I will revisit all 5 workouts at some time in the next 6 months to see how I fare at those times. (This is how I’ll let this be a competition of me against myself)

Rule 6 – Technique, technique, technique.  More important than score, time or ego.  I was using this Open as a chance to hone my skills, push a little harder than usual, and more importantly, I want to avoid injury.

Rule 7- I would let this be fun.  For me this meant that I would push like a regular crossfit day.  80-90% effort was my goal.  If I had more, I’d give more.  Ultimately I wanted to walk away from each workout feeling happy with my efforts.

I questioned Rule 7 many times.  This didn’t mean that I didn’t work hard, or that I didn’t push myself.  And the questions did pop into my mind at times: Was I being lazy?  Why wouldn’t I want to push as hard as I could?  Why wouldn’t I want to see how well I could really do?  I think it was that I was concerned that without giving myself permission to do so, I would be at risk of pushing past that hard-to-discern point between maximum effort and stupidity.  I chose this route for this particular Open to have the experience of participating while minimizing the chances of injuring myself, pushing myself into overload / stress mode, and losing sleep over a competition.  Quite frankly, other parts of my life are too important for me to not consider those things.

My rules worked for me… until I started to break them.  I saw friends and acquaintances posting their experiences and results on Facebook.  I was being texted about it and responding in kind.  It was like I was back at school where I hated the whole “How’d you do?!” frenzy that often came after tests.  I guess it was the same mentality then too – I wanted to do my best and not compare.  A hard thing to do.

I started to hear people mention strategies that made sense.  Maybe I should look into the workouts more beforehand, too, I thought.  (I shouldn’t have.) It just started me thinking, and once I went down this road, I slept poorly the night before the workout, and felt almost nauseously ill all day leading up to it.  Not the mental or physical state I was wanting to be in.

So I returned to my rules.  And reminded myself again WHY I was doing this.  I was doing this for myself. Me, Myself and I.

Instead of giving into the frustration of “I could have done better;”  or that yucky feeling of failure when you feel like “someone beat me”, I chose to see what I was gaining from this. (I may potentially reflect and blog more on this after it’s all over.)

Yes, I’ve been working hard.  Some of the workouts are as mentally taxing as they are physical.  But through it all, I see the community in our Crossfit coming together, and  I see the sharing of virtual high fives on Facebook pages everywhere as people post both their wins and challenges.

As with so many things in life – it is what you make of it.  The Crossfit Open is simply a tool – one that will be used in many different ways for the participating athletes.  And as with any tool, it can be used in useful or potentially harmful ways.  My rules were my way of making this a positive experience.

After all, I joined Crossfit to get strong, lean and fit – all in my quest to be as vibrantly healthy as possible.  I discovered a way of training that made sense to me for how we are designed to move, and it opened my eyes to a whole host of skills and strengths that I would not have otherwise had.  But I also got hooked because it was enjoyable to me.  (I still can’t quite say fun, although there are times that it certainly is).

Am I strong?  Am I healthy?  Am I learning new things?  Pushing new boundaries? You bet.  Even in the Open.  And with my rules in place – for me – there are still some times that it’s even fun.

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The Un-Hollywood Definition of Beauty

29 Wednesday Jan 2014

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, Crossfit, Musings of a Manic Mama, Women Empowered

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Aging Gracefully, Body Image, Self love

I am turning 38 this week.  And while I admit to having my own areas of vanity and self-consciousness, I don’t think I have the same degree of hang-ups with my age as many women. Nor do I have any hang-ups with my body shape or size (anymore).  It actually floors me to realize that at some point in time in the past decade, I learned to fully and completely accept myself.  Flaws and all.

When I was a teenager, I was painfully self-aware and sincerely disliked my body.  I wanted to be perfect.  My journal was filled with lamenting about stretch marks from growth spurts, disgust at cellulite, and the frustration of having short, thick ‘soccer’ legs.  I would run, train, leg lift and more in the attempts to come to terms with the body I had.  I actually think that one of the reasons I kept my journals from that young age was so that if I ever had a daughter of my own, I’d remember what it felt like to want to change the body I had.

Now that I am a mom with two young kids, I find myself checking in with them often about how they feel about themselves.  So far, their comments reinforce to me that they have a higher degree of self-love and self-acceptance than what I did.  But I wasn’t aware of those aspects of myself until the teen years, so I guess a part of me may still be holding my breath, and hoping that we’ve done a good job in teaching our kids those same lessons that I have learned over the course of my adult years:

“I am enough”

“I don’t have to be perfect”

“I am grateful for what I have”

“I am grateful for who I am”

“I love myself”

“I am worthy of love”

Or as Audra has stated, “I’m grateful for being myself.”  YES.

I think that time has allowed me to mature, see value in myself in ways I didn’t when I was younger, and to learn to be compassionate with myself.  As a recovering perfectionist, this process has been several decades in the making.

When I look in the mirror, I can’t miss seeing the fine lines around my eyes – even when I’m not smiling.  I sometimes wonder what magic cream I can find to delay the onset.  Wrinkles are not something I was planning on having to deal with.  I see the scraggly grey hairs that are beginning to crop up on my head, and I content myself with plucking them out – while wondering if I’ll ever let myself go grey.  I find myself plucking facial hairs almost every night – this is just not something I had to do in the past.

I realize that I could be at risk for allowing my earlier obsession with wanting a perfect body to transfer into a new obsession to want to look young forever.  I laugh at the fact that I’ve been asked for ID when purchasing alcohol several times in the last few years…  but in retrospect, I guess the funny part of it is that I know that there really isn’t any way of me passing for 25, let alone 19.  I wonder if the LCBO knew they might get more repeat female customers by having a quota to ID women who are in their 30’s (even when they know that they are indeed old enough).  Hmmm…

I guess it comes down to the fact that I have to learn to accept that time is going to pass and that my face and my body will change.  And even more importantly, that neither of these attributes defines who I am.

Image

Just to prove it to myself – I took this picture on a whim: post-workout, un-showered, no makeup – I didn’t even have my hair brushed.  (I’m not too sure about doing the same in a bathing suit though!)

Maybe I do only have a few years left to feel that I can pull off a bikini … OR I could choose to accept that how I look in one will continue to evolve.  AND that maybe it’s my perception of myself that will allow this to happen.  Maybe my time of passing for a twenty-something has passed – but the reality is that I wouldn’t trade the experience and wisdom time has given me simply to look a certain way or a certain age.

The fact is that I DON’T HAVE TO BE PERFECT.

Who set those standards, anyways?!

Everyone ages.  Everyone wrinkles.  Time changes us.

The images we see in the media are simply not reality: most are photo-shopped, as I’m sure many of you have seen in recent videos that have been floating around the internet.  And while I was never aware of trying to emulate them, obviously I have still been influenced.

So I am defining my beauty in an un-Hollywood way.

Why should I care what others think of me when it is my own self love that allows me to shine and bring the best of who I am to the world?

I am embracing my age, loving the experience and wisdom that time has given me.

I am remembering that my body created, supported and nurtured two lives.  In my children, I see the two most beautiful, natural works-of-art I have ever witnessed.  How could I ever do anything BUT love the body and the woman who gave birth to them?!

I am working on loving my imperfections.  They are not me.

I AM much more than how I look.

I choose to focus my attention on who I am being each day.  I focus on how strong my body has become, celebrating that at age 38, I am in the best shape of my life.  I can lift heavier, go faster, and learn new things that I could not do a short two years ago.  I appreciate that I have a husband who finds me beautiful and sexy –  who tells me so every day – and who supports me in every challenge I face through his certainty that I am fully capable in every thing I do.  In these ways and more, Dean has been a key player for me in becoming happy with who I am.

I focus on having great energy, on being able to play full-out with my kids, and for being able to go about my busy life without the constant fear of falling short. I am inspired by the women around me who are older – whether by years or decades – and who continue to push their limits constantly – whether that be in fitness, career, learning or making a difference in this world.

I am inspired by the women who have gone before me – who have been pillars of strength, independence and intelligence, and many times ‘ahead of their time’ (like my MOM and my NANNY).

I look at all the women around me every day – in my practice, in my friends, in the women I work out with, and in my community –  and see how beautiful they are in so many ways.  Loving, nurturing, giving, strong, confident, courageous – and unique.  I see the beauty that lies inside and out and marvel at the wondrous variety that exists.

I see that the world is one of beauty, no matter who the beholder may be.  

And that is not a definition that can be put into a picture – even if it were photo-shopped.

You ARE beautiful.  Trust me.

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Top 9 Tips to Feed your Family Well

19 Sunday Jan 2014

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, Eating by Design, in8 Mama: Deviating from the Mainstream, Raising Independent Thinkers

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Feeding a family; healthy meals; paleo; eating by design

“Mom, I’m really glad you’re a chiropractor.  But I wish I could eat the same foods as everyone else.  It’s not really fair, you know.”  This was Audra’s comment to me yesterday as we were driving, following her question of why I don’t agree with the Canada Food Guide.  “I’ve have studied the human body and nutrition for years,” I answered. “I have different information about food and health, and it often leads us to make different choices for our family.”

Her comments were not a surprise to me, as I’m aware that both our kids sometimes wish I didn’t have quite such strong feelings about our food choices.  But before I could say anything, she finished her thought with an observation that negated the need for me to say much of anything else: “But you know”, she pondered, “We really don’t get sick all the time like everyone else.”

So instead of launching into a long, detailed discussion of nutrition, all I had to do was acknowledge that I heard her, and remind her of what I believe to be true: “Feeding you well is part of my ‘mom job’ – to love you, keep you safe and keep you healthy.”

That ended the conversation, but not the never-ending journey of feeding our family well.  We work hard to buy quality foods from as many local sources as possible.  Our staples are meat and veggies, fruit, nut & seeds, full-fat dairy and healthy fats.  We avoid /minimize processed foods, packaged meals, sugar, gluten, breads & pastas – all because we want to fuel our family with the most nutrient-dense foods, and to help them develop a taste for real food.   We want them to understand how essential their food choices are to their health and wellbeing, as well as to their growth and performance in school and in sports – and in life in general.

And yet, our dedication to healthy eating is another way that we do things against the grain (no pun intended).  While we are far from the only families that eat this way, it certainly is not how most people approach food. (or what is recommended by Health Canada, unfortunately)  Sometimes this can be hard, especially since we don’t want to make our kids feel so different that they feel weird or left out.  And we don’t want to be so rigid that they rebel completely as they get older and even more independent.

The truth is that some days it would be easier to be blissfully unaware of all the information we have.  Some days it would be easier to throw a package in the microwave.  Or make a sandwich for lunch. Or go through a drive through for dinner.

But at the end of the day, easier isn’t what drives us.  We want to give our kids the best chance possible at vibrant, lifelong health – plus an understanding of how smart their bodies are and how incredibly amazing they are.

Over the years, we’ve faced quite an evolution with this.  Admittedly, my own understanding of nutrition has changed over the years as well – which means that the choices we made years ago differ from the ones we make now.  Both in my practice and in our home, I’ve had to admit to my past mistakes, while explaining that with new information, we make new choices.

When our kids were younger, in many ways it was easier because we were involved in every food that passed their lips.  We were present at every party and social event.  We could ‘ok’ anything they ate at school and they were too young to spend time at friend’s houses without one of us being there.  It was easy to oversee it all.

But as they’ve gotten older, there are many more times that they are not with us.  And just as I’ve found with virtually every parenting issue, as they gain more independence, we have to accept that they are going to be in many situations to make decisions where we will not be present. 

So as parents, we have to put our trust in them, and in the job we have done in teaching them WHY we make the choices we do.  (When this comes to food, I know I will cringe at times to hear what they may eat elsewhere, but I know that I am already losing some control of that.)  And as with every parenting issue, we have to ask ourselves if we’ve done the best we can to provide them with a solid foundation for making their own choices and hope (trust) that with this securely in place, more often than not their choices will be made in their best interest.  (Let’s get real here – we’re talking about food, but I feel the same about how they will fare with situations in the coming teen years like drinking & drugs, sex, and handling all manners of potentially challenging situations.)

So other than our recurring conversations about health and food – and an understanding of WHY we avoid certain foods, like junk food, processed foods, bread, and heaps of sugar – we’ve had to come up with ways to get our kids on board with our choices.  Here are a few that have helped:

1 – We teach them how amazing their bodies are.  Our two foundational statements have always been “My body is smart.”  and “I am amazing.” We teach them how foods affect their bodies and their brains – and explain how that relates to every aspect of their life: from school, sports, learning, energy, growing, creativity, to simply being the best they can be.

2  – They help plan meals. I often throw out suggestions of what I might make that week and get feedback from them if there is anything they’d like to add.  We try new recipes, look at cooking books or websites together, or pick out new things in the grocery store.

3 – They help out in the kitchen. Whether it’s making scrambled eggs for breakfast, whipping up a batch of guacamole, or chopping veggies for dinner that night, Ethan and Audra are frequent sous-chefs in our household.  Ethan often talks about the possibility of being a chef – and if his love of eating is an accurate measure, this would be a great example of following a passion for him.  (Although he did ask me the other day if I would be upset if he made meals I didn’t think were healthy.  To which I responded – “No, I just would choose to eat the ones that were.”  And that satisfied him, although I’ll admit that I hope he follows our lead.)

4 – We give them choices.  While I refuse to make separate meals for our different taste buds, we do try at most meals to have at least 2 different veggie choices, and they have to have a helping of at least one.  Salad or asparagus.  Cauliflower or carrots.  (Our love of organic butter does help, as they will eat more vegetables when they are tossed in butter with a sprinkle of salt.)  And as parents, we eat it all, too!

5 – They have to try everything but we don’t force them to eat anything.  This has lead our kids to try lots of new foods, spices and flavours.  At ages 8 & 10, they both love sushi, thai food, indian cuisine and are game to experiment wonderfully.  I’ve gotten better over the years at choosing new recipes – but sometimes I have a back-up plan in place just in case my experiment is a flop.  (like last week’s spaghetti-squash casserole – which I served as one of several side-dish options amongst leftovers… just in case.  For the record, it was eaten by everyone, but not in large quantity.  Had I gone about this differently, I think I would have had some hungry and cranky kids later in the evening.  As it went, I enjoyed an easy addition to my breakfasts and lunches in the following days.)

6 – We set ‘rules’ for when we ease up on our normal habits.   Like after Hallowe-en, when for one week the kids get to pick 2 things a day for their lunch bags.  Or how they can eat what they want at a friend’s house – but draw the line at drinking pop. Or how they devoured their great-grandma’s perogies while in Edmonton, but avoided (or minimized) their consumption of bread.

7 – We look for healthier versions of foods they want.  This has lead to many baking experiments (which is not my forte) as Audra loves muffins and they both have somewhat of a sweet tooth.  Or like Ethan’s request to make eggs benedict – in which I substituted the english muffin for biscuits made with almond flour. (Next time I’m trying potato ‘pancakes’ instead).  Or along this line, I add pureed vegetables into many of our meals and sauces – like kale into virtually every sauce, meatball or soup!)

8 – We use the natural consequences of eating poorly to help them notice how they feel when they eat ‘off track’.  Ethan has had several experiences with this one, including a history of throwing up almost every time he has had a pop.  (While unpleasant to clean up, it’s more effective in helping him avoid pop than hearing me nagging in his head!)  And Audra will often get tummy aches and feel ‘yucky’ if she eats too much sugar, or eats bread while at friends’ houses.

It’s a little ironic to me to think that one of the most basic necessities of life – FOOD – can come with so much challenge as well as joy.  I know how hard it can be to feed a family well.  I know how confusing it can be to read so many conflicting views on nutrition.

This is what has worked so far in our home.  It takes time, commitment, planning and patience.  But just like we tell our kids – our reason WHY:  their lifelong health and wellbeing – makes it so incredibly worthwhile.

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Choosing Simplicity

08 Sunday Dec 2013

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Eating by Design, My Chiropractic Life, Thinking by Design

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Family Time and Meals, Simplicity, Teaching Kids, Values

Simplicity is something I value very highly in my life.  And this time of year, my commitment to keeping things simple leaves me feeling like I’m an observer:  watching the chaos of a storm from the cozy window of my own, simple life.

I will give some of the credit for my emphasis on simplicity to the families I took care of in my first few years of practice.  With kids too young to yet be into the holiday whirlwind, I was witness to the stories other parents told of kids with mountains of un-appreciated toys, older kids who wanted bigger and better every year, and the frantic haste to get to every last store.  Combined with clear signs of stress, fatigue and tension, I decided then and there that I didn’t want our holidays to fall into that pattern.  

Simple for me means that I don’t add in more than I can give my full attention to.  It means that I have a no-drama policy – both at home and in my practice. It means that we started our own family traditions on a small scale, emphasizing the joy in giving to others while being grateful for what we receive.  All with a very conscious effort to focus on the people around us, gratitude for the life that we have, and appreciation and attention paid to every gesture of kindness – including, of course, gifts.

This weekend was an example of simple.

Yesterday at work I could probably measure my success by two simple factors: the number of times I laughed, and the number of hugs I got.  My morning started with giving a report to a ten-year-old boy (and his mom, of course).  As is always the case, I spoke directly to him about what I noticed in his initial assessment.  I explained to him three simple concepts:

1 – your body is smart

2 – your brain and body need to ‘talk’ to work properly and

3 – if your brain-body connection isn’t clear, your smart body has a harder time working at its best.

With a wise nod of his head and a few insightful comments, he asked his final, amusingly off-topic questions:  “Dr. Amy, do you live in a big house?”  (this may have been my first laugh-out-loud moment of the morning) and “Dr. Amy, do you drive a ferarri?” (my second laugh). With a smile I replied: “No, I have a simple house, and no, I don’t drive a ferrari.  I don’t really care that much about those things.  The most important thing in my life is my family and spending time with them.  We like to do things like enjoy nature, hike and travel.” He left with a pondering expression on his face.  As for me, I was amused by his perceptions – and it left me thinking, too.

The truth is that the value I place on things is a far distant runner-up to the value I place on quality time and having experiences.  Even if we had all the money in the world, we wouldn’t live much differently than we do now.  We would travel more, give more, experience more.  Don’t get me wrong – I like material things, too.  I get great pleasure out of buying quality things for my kids.  And I love the idea of building our dream home in the upcoming years.  But without the context of who I would be enjoying those things with, they are empty for me.  Things may provide some pleasure to me – but they are not what motivates me. 

The other moments this weekend that filled me up included our annual Awesome by Design workshop.  We hosted thirteen kids (age 4-10) for 2 hours in the practice, while giving their parents a few hours to themselves.  We gave the kids the same simple message (repeat after me…) “My body is smart and I am AMAZING!” (really, what more do they need to know than that?!)  Our games followed that same theme.  Our snack was a build-your-own creation using fresh fruits, veggies and toothpicks.  And our craft was a self-decorated portrait with the same message as above.  It was seamless, fun, and full of laughter.  The only complaint was from the kids when they didn’t want to leave.

On the home front, the remaining focus of the weekend was on food.  While I place a very high value on health and nutrition, I also feel that when I make good quality meals for my family, I am nourishing them in ways that surpass the calories and nutrients.  I feel a deep contentment to know that with two crockpots going, there will be delicious soups for the kids’ lunches this week.  And it never ceases to amaze me how fulfilled I am by the simple act of putting food on the table.  With three lovely family meals together (steak and veggies; eggs, bacon and fruit; and chicken with roast veggies), I am filled up in all of the ways that matter.

It seems that at this time of year, we go somewhat into hibernation mode.  We stay put more often – and are happy to do so.  It just so happens that sometimes that lends itself to wonderful little moments of joy.  Like the surprise evening finale of our kids dimming the living room lights to put on a play for us with masks they discovered downstairs.  With the assurance that they will be planning lots of performances for us – complete with giggles and silliness – what more could we ask for?  Live theatre from the comfort of our own home.  Perfect.

Robinson live theatre performance

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Winning at the Aging Game

20 Friday Sep 2013

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, Fully expressed, Women Empowered

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Aging gracefully (vibrantly!); Life by Design; Creating health

I want to be a rock-climbing grandma. Yes, I know that is many decades away – but there is a vision I have of me being an 80-year-old hip and feisty, rock-climbing grandma.  Why rock climbing?  I don’t know… as a matter of fact, I haven’t even taken up the sport yet.

As for the whole concept of aging – well, let’s face reality:  time keeps on ticking.  There isn’t really a way to ‘win the game.’  This whole hyper-fascination with age – I think most of it’s really all in our heads.

However, there is a difference between a person’s chronologic age and their physiologic age.  And since I can’t change the first, I am putting my bets on the second.  I want to be healthier in my 40’s than I was in my 20’s.  I want to be happier in my 50’s than I was in my 30’s.  I want the quality of my life to make the anticipated quantity worthwhile.  Simply put: I want to play full out.

No one can deny that time passes and that we all get older.  But I’m happy to say that after years of writing that one of my goals was to be in the best shape of my life, I can finally say that it’s true.  It astounds me that I am stronger at 37 than I was as a varsity athlete, but it’s simply the truth.  As for all those years that I set the goal without achieving it… well, I didn’t take action to make it happen.  Now I do.  I work out harder (and smarter!), I eat better, I take more time for myself, I invest quality time in the relationships that mean the most to me, and I take time to have fun.  It’s my recipe for success.  Simple but powerful.

After almost 10 years in practice, it never ceases to amaze me how many people state that they feel old ‘because they are in their 30’s’.  They chalk it up to aging, without looking at their lifestyle, stress levels, or how long they have neglected their health, been inactive or eaten garbage disguised as food.  Of course our bodies slow down with age, just not to the degree that most people think.  The sad truth is that by the time people reach their 30’s, many have already accumulated decades of poor habits. I’d feel old if I did those things, too.

What I remind them is that they are designed to be extraordinary;  that we never lose the natural drive within for our bodies to move towards health when given what it needs. 

Feeling old, tired, stressed?  It doesn’t have to be a life sentence. That, too, can change.  It takes time, effort and consistency, but believe me – you’re worth it.

I believe that age is relative.  And while I can’t change the number of days I’ve walked this earth, I can certainly take responsibility for the quality of those days and the quality of my own health. It doesn’t even fit to say that I want to age gracefully.  No, I want to age vibrantly.

Vi-brant / Adverb : full of energy and enthusiasm.

So here it is:  I want to live to be 100+, with great quality of life.  I want to be one of those grandmas that are feisty, and full of life.  I want to live my life to the fullest, traveling around the world, having new experiences, being a lifelong learner and all while making an impact in my community and profession.  And the vision that solidifies that for me is being an 80-year-old rock-climbing grandma.  Maybe it’s the idea of taking up an outdoor, physically challenging sport that I didn’t grow up doing.  Maybe it’s the idea of pushing the limits.   Maybe it’s an image that fits for trying to prove a point.  Or maybe it’s just that I want to feel that I have lived my life to the fullest for all of my days.  No regrets.  Nothing left on the table.

SkydivingGrandma_7-21-11

At the end of my days, I’d like to ask myself:  Have I played full out?  Have I given my life all I’ve got?  And the only answer I expect to hear is a resounding YES.

If I break it down, I realize that I spent roughly a decade playing as a young child, another one experimenting as a teenager, another one growing through the school/career/marriage/babies stage, and this one discovering more about who I am and what I want to do in this lifetime.  Even if I only live to 80, I’m not even half way there.  And that’s kind of exciting.  So much time to use, to learn, to explore, to make a difference – and ultimately to make the most of.

Worried about aging?  Hell, no.  I’m just getting started!

(And for the record: Ethan and Audra started rock-climbing classes this week.  I’m almost giddy to join them.  Oh yeah…. it begins…)

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Trying new things

11 Wednesday Sep 2013

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, Crossfit, Fully expressed

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

crossfit, Having new experiences, Testing your limits, The neurology of change

Last night I taught a Move by Design class at the crossfit near my practice.  I had the opportunity to connect with 20 new people, introducing them to the concepts of how they are designed to be extraordinary, and more specifically on how they are designed to move.  But the best part of the night for me was in the form of a conversation I had with a woman afterwards.

“Why do I love crossfit so much?” , she asked me.  I chuckled, recognizing that while she was being introduced to a new approach to movement, she was feeling something awaken within herself that felt so good, so natural, and so right – and yet here she was, trying to figure out what was so attractive about it.  The competitive nature it awakens?  The community it creates?  Yes and yes,  but there was something more.  Upon further conversation, I think the answer for her was found in rising to the challenge of trying new things, and in the process – discovering that she could do more than she thought she was capable of.  And it got me thinking…

How often as adults do we try new things?  Test our limits?  See if we are strong enough, fast enough, creative enough, or brave enough?  I think in this case, the attraction of crossfit is that adults are finding themselves in an environment of doing new things – sometimes every day – or in testing their limits.  Much like when we were kids and we’d see if we could piggyback the heaviest kid, or run the fastest, or climb the highest tree, or jump off the highest ledge.  Childhood comes inherent with the question of “I wonder if I can do that?” followed logically by the attempt to do so.  We weren’t so hampered by the fear of getting hurt, or wondering if we’d look silly, or the fear of stepping up to the plate and failing.  We simply did new things for the sake of trying something new.

I wonder where we lost the drive to play?  I for one, can say that I’ve rekindled that in myself.  I now look at challenges with an extra gleam in my eye.  I’m back to wondering “I wonder if I can do that?!”

In my background of biology, psychology, and neurology, it fascinates me to uncover how we work.   What’s amazing is that brain science has now proven that our brains can change at any point in our life – from cradle to grave.  Amazing books, like that of Dr. Joe Dispenza (Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself) or Dr. Norman Doidge (The Brain that Changes Itself) go into this new understanding of how every new stimulus to the brain can make change.  And the simple truth of neurology is that every time we do something new, our brain creates new pathways.  Those pathways create the framework for all future activity, learning and perception.  And with repetition, those pathways become strong.

Think about it – if you never do anything different, how can you expect your brain to handle change?   Or – even crazier – to thrive with change?!  (As an aside, I’m not saying that change is easy… but it is oh-so-good for you!)

With this understanding, I get excited when people tell me changes that are taking place in their lives:   kids starting new schools, people starting new jobs, families trying new activities.  From the perspective of maximizing your potential – well, change is simply one of the best stimulants for growth.  Again – not always easy, but definitely good for you.

Brain Change Quote

So… what can you try that is new?  Truthfully, what are the actions that you do repetitively – and do you think they are helping you to grow?  Do you test your boundaries?  Try new things?  Even new foods, new books, new routes home from work?

Or are you going through life on autopilot?

I for one, want to live my life to the fullest.  For me, this also means continuing to stimulate my brain to grow.  I am committed to being a lifelong learner.  I wish to always see the world from a multitude of perspectives.  I want to have new experiences, see new places, learn new things, test my boundaries, and ultimately live life to the fullest.  Intellectually, experientially, physically – I want it all.  I simply know that that means I need to stay open to a lifetime of trying new things, pushing the limits of my comfort zones, and taking imperfect action. (By that, I mean not waiting until every circumstance is just right – because just as anyone who has ever tried to plan a family knows, the ‘perfect time‘ just doesn’t exist.  Sometimes we simply have to take the plunge in life.)  Sometimes I will fall, sometimes I will find things I choose not to repeat.  But the exhilaration of expanding my own abilities, understanding and horizons is just too tempting.

So what are you doing new these days?  Do you want to always stay the same?  Or are you too afraid of change?  (Old dogs CAN learn new tricks – they just have to WANT to change)

So on that note: Here’s what I did for the first time today:

I saw a post of a friend doing this yesterday, and I thought to myself: “I wonder if I can do that?”  Up until today, I simply hadn’t tried.  Sure, I had done lots of 20” and 24” box jumps – but testing to see how high I could jump?  No, not yet – but it sure seemed like fun to try!

I’ll admit that 33” was a breeze, and 36” was pretty easy.  But I balked at 40”.  I found myself thinking “what if I fall and hurt myself?”.  And even though in my mind I flashed back to teaching Ethan to ride a bike (“Picture yourself flying with ease; don’t focus on falling!”), and my friends were chirping in my ear: “What do you teach your kids?”  (these ladies know me well!):  “YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!”

At 40″ I tried and failed.  (Even though I know I can do it.)  But I’m thrilled with what I did today.  Today I tried something new.  I know I’m breaking ground.  I know I’m just a little bit better for it.

Next time it’ll be to test my limits.

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Strong Kids

22 Saturday Jun 2013

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Crossfit, Moving by Design, My Chiropractic Life

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

crossfit, Kids and Posture, Kids and Strength, Moving by Design

I just got back from the park with Ethan, where we spent our time ‘working out’ – although it felt like play.  For any of you in the ‘Crossfit world’, we essentially turned our park visit into a kids-version WOD (workout of the day).  It came about on our walk home from the library, when he stopped me to ask, “Mom, can we stop and do more pull ups like last night?” And so we did, and had lots of fun together (while probably getting some quizzical looks from some of the other parents there).

As a chiropractor who works with kids, I have always been an advocate for kids being active, with daily outdoor time, a variety of activities, and with exercise coming in the form of play.  My advice to parents when they ask what their kids should be doing has been to PLAY;  go to the playground, do monkey bars, climb, dance, do gymnastics, swim and so on.  And the same applies when I’ve had kids in my practice who are facing postural challenges, with the accompanying evidence of lacking good core strength.

So it was somewhat to my surprise this past week while I was re-assessing Ethan that I noted postural patterns showing up that concerned me.  As a child who has been checked and adjusted as necessary since the night he was born – and shows every evidence of being spectacularly healthy and strong – this discovery came with some questions I was forced to ask myself.  (And given that I have a thriving practice full of kids – I realized that I would have to be okay with the possibility of my precious ego getting bruised (Dr. Amy, how could you miss this?!))   However, in order to fulfill my role as his mom in keeping him as healthy as possible, I would have to put my full awareness into WHY this was going on – AND what strategies would be required to change it.  (Ego-be-gone, Dr. Amy – this isn’t about you.  It’s about HIM and what his body needs to THRIVE.)

Firstly – as his mom/chiropractor, I had to ask myself: Had I been objective enough while checking him to provide the best chiropractic care possible to him?  (While this may seem redundant to anyone who is not in this or another similar profession, classically the most difficult people for anyone to take care of are those people – like immediate family – who we are so close to that it blurs the certainty and objectivity we may have while taking care of other people in our offices.) Simply put – this makes it easier to potentially ‘miss’ things that we would see with other people or children.

Secondly – were there any habits that may be underlying this that we had become slack on?  Had we started to allow too much sedentary time?  (And why would this matter?  Well, just picture the rolled in posture of kids on their devices – and you’ll quickly get the idea).

Thirdly – Why was he lacking in strength in some of his core muscles – and what could I do about it?  Did I need to consider any other types of care providers to give us new actions to take?  Massage?  What type of movement did he require?  And would it be enough?

My first step was to put these questions to my go-to resource of the other Life by Design chiropractors I collaborate with.   The general consensus answered my questions in much the way that I anticipated:  1 – Consider having someone else assess him.  And 2 – Look at whether the basic requirements for movement were being fulfilled.  Despite the fact that I teach Move by Design and implement it for myself, I realized that the answer likely lay there.

At first glance, he’s an active kid.  But with a more honest look here, I realized that over the winter months, he had been quite sedentary.  And while now he was in the running club at school, doing track and field, and playing baseball, there was no focus on mobility work or strength building – nor a great variety in movements.

Here was my Aha! Moment:  Why don’t I teach my kids their scaled version of Move by Design?  (duh?!)  (Despite a slight degree of “what was I thinking” mindset… DR. AMY…?!,  I’d rather share this thought process and swallow my pride here, knowing it will probably help other parents and kids.)

So now we have a plan in place.  It started today at the park.  We did monkey bars, timed how long he could hang in place, did chin ups, jumping pull ups, and climbed the fire poles.  We did push ups – with strict form, just like at crossfit – timed how long he could hold a plank, worked on proper form for squatting, and did burpees.  We did ‘box jumps’ and step ups onto the picnic table.  And he wanted MORE.  We were having so much fun – possibly as a funny sight as I was still in my work clothes – that we didn’t even notice the other people at the park.  I’m sure some of them may have wondered what we were doing  – and maybe even “Why is that mom making him do that?!”  Except that from the look of sheer joy on his face, and his excited cries of ‘What else can I do?!”, combined with our laughter – there was no doubt that this was still play.

As a mom who loves to work out, build strength and test my abilities, it was lots of fun seeing this in Ethan.  (Obviously not for the first time).  Just when I thought it should be time to call it quits, he insisted on more.  And so I gave him a series of movements in the same form as a WOD at Crossfit:

2 rounds of:

3 step ups on the park bench

50 m sprint

3 burpees

50 m sprint

3 chin ups

Rest 30 seconds and repeat.

On our walk home, he was laying out our ‘plan’ of training 3 times a week.  Once with a focus on strength work – pull ups, push ups, squats (etc); once with a focus on metabolic training – sprints, jumps and timed races (etc); and once with a focus on balance and gymnastics – monkey bars/bar work, handstands, headstands and balancing poses. He’s all game for doing it all – plus mobility work with the foam roller and lacrosse ball.  And I’m thinking that my own weekly regime of working out 3 times a week may just have doubled…  AND I have no doubt that Audra will be on board, too.

I guess our summer has just added to its routine.  And I for one can’t wait to watch and measure how things change.

(Looking for more?  Check out http://www.crossfitkids.com)

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A Love Letter to my Practice (aka Why I love being a chiropractor)

26 Sunday May 2013

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, My Chiropractic Life

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Being a chiropractor, Changing the World, Making a Difference

I am feeling humbled and overwhelmed with gratitude with the realization of what amazing relationships I have in my life.  Surprisingly, it is not my family – or husband – that I am reflecting on right now.

Rather, I am completely humbled by the amazing people who come to see me in my practice.

On Saturday morning I had Ethan and Audra at work with me.  During a busy morning of adjusting families, it became increasingly clear to me how much I love the relationships that have grown over the years in my practice.  As I introduced Audra to some of the families who had not yet met her (while Ethan was hiding in the back reading), it hit me like a wave that an incredible number of them had met her when she was much, much younger – and a significant number had even been under care with me when I was pregnant with her over 8 years ago.  Even for those people who are new to my practice, it felt fitting to introduce them to my family – a bringing-together of those parts of my life that are so important to me.

I felt like my heart was blown wide open as I looked at these beautiful families – many of whom I had known since before their own kids were born, and whose children had been seeing me since shortly after their births.  Even thinking of it now, I am brought nearly to tears by the magnitude of the trust they all place in me to take care of them and their loved ones.  It is a trust that I will never take for granted.

I doubt that many people who come through our doors have any inkling of how much they also add to my life.  In so many cases, the ‘benefits’ might be perceived as one-sided.  I help them (or more specifically, I support their body in healing itself as it is designed to do, and remind them of how amazing they – and their bodies – are), and their expression of health and life improves.

But what may not be seen is the depth of honour I feel to take care of the people in my community and their families.   The trust that is shown to me every single day, by every person who walks in my door – and especially those who place their children in my hands – is what truly humbles me.  And it is payment unlike any other.

As a caregiver, healer, and chiropractor, I doubt that many people know how much I get from being a part of their lives.  I doubt many can fathom how much I love taking care of entire families, including the extended branches and multiple generations.  I revel in the opportunity to support them through the various stages of pregnancy, life with babies, and onwards.  Or how I think about them, even when they are not in the office.  How I care, sincerely and deeply.  Or how much I marvel over how quickly the kids grow and how quickly time flies.  I see it in my own life watching my own children – but that same feeling is experienced over and over again in my practice, as well.  And in much the same way, I hope that I fulfill my role there with exceptional care.

What fills me up is seeing more people express more of the life, health and happiness that is possible for them.  Like many of the people I see, perhaps they began to sleep again, or have more energy.  Perhaps they became pregnant after years of trying, or get to experience comfortable, healthy pregnancies.  Perhaps they have peace of mind with how their children are growing – thriving with strong immune systems and full of life.  Perhaps they can move without pain, or go through their life without feeling limited.  Perhaps they have stopped needing medications for a variety of ills.  Perhaps they feel more alive, younger, and happier.  Perhaps they get to watch their babies and children thrive with the abundant health and happiness that is their natural birthright.

Perhaps they feel HOPE for the first time in a long time, learn to TRUST their bodies, learn how to SUPPORT that inborn wisdom, and in the process, truly THRIVE.

See, with every person who becomes a part of my practice, my own purpose is also being fulfilled:  to inspire and empower people to live their lives to the fullest.  I am driven by the desire to help create a world that is healthier, happier, more connected, peaceful and whole.  It is a world that is based on principles of collaboration, trust and with every person knowing that THEY are magnificent.  And I believe we all create this together by living our own lives to our fullest potential.  I believe it is by bringing our own unique strengths and talents to the world that we create it anew; a world built from our inspiration, creativity, uniqueness and magnificence.

I guess this is also coming from a realization I had after spending the last few weeks speaking often in my community.  I know that people who attend my workshops learn a lot, leave inspired, and that the information I provide can truly change their lives.  But the truth is that the people that I get to make the biggest difference with are those who join the family of friends in my practice.  The immeasurable factor here is the relationship we build over weeks, months and years – getting to truly know people, and being the constant reminder of those simple but essential things they need to know (and that, unfortunately, are not yet at the core of the society we currently live in).  I become the reminder and resource for what we already know deep inside – that our bodies are smart, designed for health, and vitality, and that we can create a life of abundant health, happiness and vitality.

I see all of this when I look at all the families I get to take care of.  I look at the babies and children, and see all the potential in the world wrapped up inside their cute, cuddly selves.  I can see the possibility for them to grow up knowing that they are powerful and capable, with bodies that are smart and self-healing, and with great confidence in themselves and their abilities – and it gives me a glimpse of how this world I envision will one day come to exist.

With this in mind, perhaps it is easy to see how my forms of payment are so much more than just monetary. I get hugs, cuddles and gurgles from newborns, one-of-a-kind artwork, and many smiles from faces of every age.  I get to watch lives unfold, and support amazing people through challenges and triumphs.  I get to laugh, cry, celebrate with, and be moved by the many people I come to know.

Taking care of people in this way is a great honour, and fills me up every single day.  I am humbled by the opportunity to be a part of their lives, and fulfilled by seeing evidence every day of how I can make a difference.  It is by adding value to other people’s lives that my life grows exponentially.  It is through the connections we make and the relationships we build that I can see this amazing world and its beautiful people become more alive, connected, vibrant and empowered.

I am simply so grateful to be a part of it all.

(And for those of you in my practice: THANK YOU.)

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Everyday Miracles – some thoughts from my chiropractic practice

08 Friday Mar 2013

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, Fully expressed, My Chiropractic Life

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

Chiropractic, Healing, Miracles, Potential

After nine years in practice, it is rare that I have someone come into see me who is intensely skeptical about what I do as a chiropractor.  With a practice that is full of families, pregnant women, babies and kids – and with 95% of those coming from referrals of people who are seeing amazing changes in their lives – I guess I had forgotten that my approach is different from how many people look at their health.

I had lost touch with how many people are disconnected from the fact that our bodies are smart and heal themselves.  I forgot that this basic foundation might be foreign to someone who is used to ignoring their health, their body, and not taking the time to recognize that health requires effort.  I forgot that many people do not make their choices based on knowing how amazing they are.

But the simple truth is this: We are designed to be extraordinary.  And our choices can create that – or hinder it.

Ironically, this man was brought – almost kicking and screaming – by his wife.  He was so resistant to being there at first that I actually stopped mid-conversation to ask him if he actually wanted to be there.  (That stopped him in his tracks a bit.)  But what got him to start opening up a little was watching me check his three month old son. “Wow, you’re really good with babies”, he commented.  “It’s what I do all day,” I explained, letting him know that almost half of my practice is kids – “My job is to check their spine and nervous system to make sure the connection between their brain and body is clear.  A clear connection is required for the optimal function of every part of our body.  We explain it to the kids as “keeping their power on.”  And it’s so much easier to monitor and keep a child healthy as he grows than it is to abuse our bodies for years or decades and then try to make change.”

I don’t know yet what this particular man will decide to do for himself and his own health.  My job is to give him the information to make choices – and to let him know, that just like his perfect newborn son – he is designed for health, that it is possible for him to rebuild it, starting with turning his own “power on”.  And by believing that it can be done.

And so early this morning, I am pondering this interaction.  I think I read enough of the signs to see that there were a few things underlying it.  Firstly – wanting to ignore our bodies and health, not wanting to know if “anything’s wrong” – which leads into people also ignoring their own choices.  Secondly – wanting something different for our children – but being scared that they may turn out exactly as us.  Which, quite honestly, is likely to happen in most cases.  Good or bad, what our children learn about health starts with observing their parents.  And so, I can empathize as to what concerns may exist for a parent – who obviously adores their child – but whose own health is poor, and whose own choices may be problematic.

All of this got me to thinking about how much we take for granted about our health.  Is it possible that so many people think there’s “nothing I can do about it”?  I would hate to live in a world like that.

The world I live in is full of possibilities.  It is a world where health is our natural state.  Our bodies are encoded with the knowledge of how to function magnificently:  full of energy, happiness, strength and potential.  I look at children and I see everything that is possible in the world.  They are pure potential.  And my job is so simple – just help keep them perfect by making sure that their brain-body connection is clear, getting that vital information back and forth between their growing bodies and brains – and letting that inborn wisdom do what it does best:  heal, regulate and grow.  Nature is so amazing, if we can just get out of its way.

If I sit for a moment and think on some of the lives I have seen change over the years, it’s like a movie that plays through my mind.

Like Massimo, a newborn who was born with a paralyzed right arm – and who regained full use of that arm after a month of being adjusted.

Like Andrew – a six-year-old boy with a language processing delay that made conversations, play or school interactions very challenging – and who regained the ability to speak clearly over the course of a summer – allowing him to regain his self esteem, and to learn at the same rate as his classmates.

Like 8-year-old Matthew – who had had 13 surgeries for repeated ear infections – who stopped having issues and whose ENT (ear nose and throat specialist) recently told him “Matthew, I never need to see you again.”

Like 9-year-old Anna – who had suffered with constipation for all of her life – and who now – at age 13 – doesn’t remember what it felt like to be bloated or constipated.

Like Emily, a newborn who couldn’t latch to breastfeed – and who now nurses like a champ.

Like Maddison, who was born with so much force on the cranial bones of her head that her facial features were notably asymmetrical – and whose head reshaped itself within months (and who is now a beautiful school-age child).

Like Jacob, who would wake at night crying from “growing pains” in his legs – and who now is a great hockey player.

Like Mikayla – who at 18 months wasn’t walking -and who started taking her first steps within days of getting adjusted.

Like Christian, a 6-year-old boy on the autistic spectrum who was non-verbal when we met and constantly sick -and who now talks a blue streak every week when I see him.

Like everyone – that ability for amazing health is there.  Waiting to be woken up, supported, TRUSTED.  People no longer ask us at my practice why we are always so happy.  Look at what we get to be a part of.  Believe it or not:  Nature works.   And one essential thing that every human being requires is a clear connection between their brain and their body.  Chiropractic works. Without 100% communication, we can never be 100%.  It’s as simple as that.

I guess that’s why I sometimes adopt the approach to take it or leave it.  I know I can’t help people who don’t want to be helped – or who don’t think it’s possible.

But for those who do – I’m going to be busy in my practice helping families be at their best, watching the changes unfold in the people under my hands as we make sure that their power is ON.  I’m going to live each day in awe of the amazing ability of our bodies to heal, and in appreciation for the magnificence in every single human being.  What a world this would be if everyone allowed this to be a part of their lives.

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Just a little wrong all day

27 Wednesday Feb 2013

Posted by Dr. Amy Robinson in Creating Health, Crossfit, Eating by Design, Moving by Design

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

crossfit, Eating by Design, Moving by Design

I think my theme today would be that I was just a little wrong.  All day.

It seems like everything I did was just a little off.  Not bad.  Just not quite right.

It started with my workout at Crossfit Bradford.  15 rope climbs interspersed with a lift called a snatch.  Now, I like rope climbs – like I wrote about in a previous blog... but I thought 7 in one workout was a lot. 15 might just be enough to be obscene, at least if you have the “not-quite-right” technique that I use.  I work way too hard, burn out my forearms, and don’t use the power of my legs to get me up the rope.  That would be just too easy, I guess.  But being the stubborn person that I can be, I think I got through them by sheer determination.  Slowly.

The ultimate “little bit wrong” was getting to the point of reaching within inches of the top at one point – I think it was on rope climb number 8 – and not being able to hold on for that one extra reach.  Unfortunately that’s considered a “no rep” in the crossfit world – which means that it simply doesn’t count.  So I ended up doing 16 *&%^%- ing rope climbs instead of 15… and on my last one it happened again.  Inches shy, and I just couldn’t hold on for that one last pull.

Without another thought, I called it a day – frustrated with my hands that wouldn’t grip anymore.  I guess I figured that I could count myself as completing the workout since I was only short by inches, making up for it with a whole other 15-foot rope climb (14 and a half to be exact).  For the first time in all of the 180+ workouts I’ve done there, I think I was beat.  Almost just didn’t quite cut it today.

To salvage my day, I decided to spend the rest of the day making meals for my family.  I get a great sense of accomplishment out of knowing that there are good, healthy meals sitting in my fridge or freezer.  Cooking isn’t rocket science.  It wouldn’t overtax me.  It would be perfect for my mood today.

And though it wasn’t all a flop, two more “little bit wrongs” rounded out the day.  First, I decided to make a grain-free pizza dough.  It took quite a bit of work, and certainly didn’t spread out that way it was supposed to (and stuck to the parchment paper, too – what a pain)  Looking at the itty-bitty pizza that was supposed to feed our whole family, I kind of hoped no one would like it… since there was no way that there would be enough to go around if my usually-ravenous crew wanted enough to fill their bellies.  Happily – and unfortunately – it was a hit.  But we ate it kind of like an appetizer.  Out came the leftover pulled pork from last night to make up the difference.  Not a flop, but not quite right… again.

Thinking I had just a little saving grace in the large pot of chili I was making on the stove to freeze, I took it easy on myself for the dinner fiasco.  Until, of course, I added in the spice mix for the chili (check out the one I usually use on Robb Wolf’s site if you’re interested). This winter I’ve been experimenting with making my own spice mixes, but have neglected to properly label them.  And voila – we have a new, unintentional experiment bubbling on our stove:  chili with Josh Rogan curry spices.  Might it be yummy?  Possibly.  That mix rocks when I put it in our favourite curried lamb stew.  But in chili?  I just don’t know.  For now, this final oops has rounded out my day of well-intended actions that went just a little awry.

I know I could focus on what I did well today, as I usually do.  But while I’m certainly not going to dwell on these little details, I think that I’m just going to accept that today, I was just a little bit off.  All day.

Tomorrow I’ll be stellar.

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The lofty side of this is that I am a mom on a mission. I am striving to create a better world by being the best, most inner-directed mother I know how to be. The other side of this is that I became a mom.... on purpose. Meaning, I chose this. But man, it can be hard.

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  • Moving on from Mom on Purpose
  • The Hardest Week of my Life – 2 Years Later
  • My Parenting Panic Attack – again
  • Absurdly happy to be 40
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Real life. Fully expressed. And not always Inspired.

Mom on Purpose

The lofty side of this is that I am a mom on a mission. I am striving to create a better world by being the best, most inner-directed mother I know how to be. The other side of this is that I became a mom... on purpose. Meaning, I chose this. But man, it can be hard.

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Lessons in parenting from children themselves

dr andrea ryan

Chiropractor. Mom. Wife. Author. Health & Wellness Leader. Increasing My Level of Awesomeness

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